Uncomfortable Magic

It was one simple question that changed everything. 

It was about a year ago, during one of my leadership development classes. (Shout out to Class II of Leadership Glen Rose.) We were wrapping up our day, taking care of some housekeeping items and about to adjourn until the next session.

“Drew … I don’t mean to interrupt, but I wanted to know if it would be appropriate to affirm someone in the room before we finish?”

That simple question came from longtime educator Lauri Mapes, and I felt like it definitely warranted an interruption. 

“Absolutely,” I quickly responded. "The floor is yours."

Radical honesty: I don’t remember exactly what Mrs. Mapes said or who she affirmed. But I do know that it was a game changer for that class.

Why was it so powerful?

It’s a two-part answer: 1) It was so organic, heartfelt and real; 2) It didn’t just stop at one affirmation; it turned into a wonderfully great snowball barreling down the side of a beautiful mountain. After Mrs. Mapes poured into one of her classmates, someone else wanted to affirm someone else. That affirmation turned into another affirmation, and that one turned into another. Before we knew it … magic.

From that moment on, we did affirmations at the end of every session for Class II of Leadership GR. (And when we started Class III this year, we continued this new formidable tradition.) 

But the ripple effects didn’t stop in Glen Rose. I felt inspired to take this to other communities. I wanted to implement it within other leadership classes that I was facilitating.

I started referring to this impactful exercise as “a beautiful red ribbon” that we tied around the end of each session. Again, the adjective “powerful” is appropriate, accurate and not over-exaggerated in any shape, form or fashion.

And then you have the cascading impact! Here’s a quick ripple effect story, and then I’ll share how this came back to impact me directly and personally.

After a round of affirmations during the leadership class in Burleson, we had an eye-opening follow-up discussion. One of the questions I asked the group: “How did it feel when you were affirmed and validated?”

Of course, everyone said that it felt really good, but they also agreed there was a little apprehension and anxiety when someone called them out in a wonderfully great way.

One person in the class said: “I had no idea what they were going to say. I was nervous.”

Someone else admitted that they didn’t want to be in the spotlight. “I was thinking ‘please don’t choose me … please don’t choose me.’ ”

It was interesting to hear how many people in the class actually agreed with this thought process. I was one of them. It resonated with me too. 

I really felt this apprehension and anxiety during a recent graduation ceremony for one of my leadership classes. I went to Wylie to help celebrate Class XXII – the self-proclaimed “best class ever.” During the ceremony, they called me up on stage and said some of the kindest, nicest and most empowering things ever said about me.

As I stepped up to receive the kind words, I thought back to that discussion in Burleson.

"Please don’t choose me … please don’t choose me.”

Radical honesty: I felt uncomfortable, I was apprehensive and I felt like an imposter. But at the exact same time, I felt completely loved and appreciated. 

I wanted to share what one of the class leaders (shoutout to Susan) wrote about me and shared with the graduation audience.

NOTE: Even though this is a total flex, I share these empowering words with a grateful heart….

When I first started Leadership Wylie, I thought I was signing up to learn more about leadership in our city. 

And I did. 

But what I didn’t expect was how much I would learn about myself.

Drew, you have this incredible ability to challenge people without making them feel judged. You pushed us to think bigger, dig deeper and stop hiding behind the comfortable versions of ourselves. Every session, you reminded us that leadership is not just about titles, accomplishments or influence, it’s about intention. It’s about how we show up for our businesses, our families, our community and honestly for ourselves.

And I think one of the things that impacted me most was the consistency of your message. 

Every single session, we stood up, said our names, shared a recent win and answered whether we live a blessed life. At first, it felt simple. But over time, I realized it was teaching us something bigger. It forced us to pause long enough to recognize growth, gratitude and purpose even in the middle of busy lives and difficult seasons.

Drew, you helped create a space where people felt safe enough to grow. Safe enough to be vulnerable. Safe enough to admit they wanted more out of life, more out of leadership and more out of themselves.

For me personally, Leadership Wylie became more than a program. It became permission. Permission to work on myself. Permission to grow into the leader I want to become. Permission to understand that being Todd’s wife and a mom to our four beautiful children are roles I deeply cherish but they are not the only parts of who I am. You helped me realize it’s not selfish to want to evolve. It’s necessary.

You lead with wisdom, humor, patience and intentionality. And whether you fully realize it or not, the ripple effect of that matters. This class is walking away stronger, more confident and more connected because of the investment you made in us.

Thank you for reminding us to live boldly. To lead intentionally. And to never settle for simply existing when we are capable of truly making an impact.

We are all better because of you.

As uneasy as I felt as she read her beautiful words, it was like gas on my fire - a testament to how far a kind word and/or an affirmation can go.

So ... my challenge to you: Let’s make people feel uncomfortable. Let’s pour into the people who positively impact our lives. Let’s not be afraid to give a genuine compliment. Let’s be bold in regards to expressing our love, gratitude and admiration. 

Why?

Because even though it might feel a little awkward at first, we all need a little validation to help us keep moving forward ... to help us battle the head trash ... to help us navigate the ups and downs of life.